Suffering: “Did You Ever Ask God Why?

Angel statue pleading with God

Have You Ever Asked God, “Why?” A while back a reader asked me, “Have you ever asked God why? Did He answer?” Most of us have asked “Why?” There are so many why’s to ask God: Why are you letting this awful thing happen to my family? Why aren’t you listening to my prayers? Why did you let us get married in the first place? Why couldn’t he love me? Why wasn’t he faithful to his wedding vows? Why dn’t you stop bad things from happening in the world?  So my short answer is, yes, I’ve asked God “why?” many times. Sometimes it seems as though He has answered and sometimes it feels like lonely silence. A Lot of “How” Before the “Why” When I first learned my marriage was in trouble, I was too stunned to ask God “why?”  At that point, I was just scrambling to keep my life from unraveling. It was a blurry year and a half before we actually separated and eventually divorced. During that time the gut-wrenching betrayal of abandonment and emotional devastation consumed me while I struggled to accept and adjust to a new reality. My depression and anxiety kicked it up a notch and medication only took the…

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Separation & Divorce – The Grieving Process

Image via Wikipedia The death of a marriage is very very similar to the death of a loved one. In some ways, it can be worse (in my opinion). For me, the death of my husband’s love for me and the subsequent destruction of our marriage was the worst thing I’d ever experienced. The extenuating circumstances, of course, have a lot to do with the level of pain involved. As I went through separation and divorce, I felt, and still feel, that the only pain that could have been worse would have been the death of one of my children. From the time my marriage was dealt the first really destructive blow until the day the divorce was final was a period of 2 1/2 years.   That was a time of intense pain, disappointment, fear, panic, denial, hope (occasionally), strength… and weakness. For well over a year, I cried at least once every day…but it was usually more than once. Up until that point, I had cried maybe once every 5 years, if that!  In other words, I’m not a crier by nature, so this was way out of character for me and it was horrid. What would make the…

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